My One True Love

I just don’t get it. What do these women want from me? Seriously, I can’t leave my apartment without one of them trying to flirt with me.
They TRY, yes, but I don’t respond. I am not that much of a flirter. Flirting is too emotional. I hate emotions. They are illogical. I prefer things I can predict due to probability calculations. You can’t do that with emotions. I know this because I’ve tried it. It just doesn’t work. And things that don’t work are among the top five of things I hate.
So, back to these women. I think they are really stupid. What exactly on my disinterested face makes them think I want to flirt with them? They don’t even get it when I tell them to leave me alone. And when I forget my manners and get really angry they tell me I’m such a rude drake before they finally leave me alone. Oh, really? How about you leave me alone when I tell you so in the first place? Ever heard of that?
I think they just see me as a challenge, that they have to break through my hard outer shell to find my heart of gold. But there is one thing I have to tell you: There is no heart of gold inside my chest, just this fist sized muscle that pumps blood through my veins. So, give it up! I will never commit myself to a woman even if she would be the most beautiful woman on Puckworld. First, beauty can’t really be measured (well, okay, it has something to do with the symmetry of the face, but that is too boring for me to actually think it through), and second, I don’t have the time to take care of a girlfriend. My time is precious. I won’t waste it on some of this illogical emotions-stuff. And yes, that’s what I think a relationship is.
I’d rather spend my time working. I am a workaholic! I live for my work. Chemistry, physics, military technology, nanotechnology, bionics – those are the things I want to spend my time with. Science is my life. Science is logic, ratable, something I can calculate, and – most importantly – not emotional. If I had to choose between a woman and science I’d always prefer science.
If I had to put it in some emotional way which women usually like most, I’d put it that way: I love science. Science is my life, my one and only. Science is my one true love. Sorry, ladies, you’ll always play second fiddle in my life – if any. And now, leave me alone.